One of my favorite attributes in people, is
in fact the ability to have a deep n’ meaningful.
I spent a lot of my life as a rather closed
off person. R. A. and Andrew, you can both attest to the fact that I didn’t
talk much, or express myself much, or try to involve myself in things, and was
in fact, kind of an asshole.
This did not, as you might expect, lend
itself to my being a particularly happy person. I didn’t have too many friends,
I never had a girlfriend, our family was the closest thing I had to a social
group, all those things people like doing when they’re young, like partying and
drinking and going out and doing things, I just never really did.
But then something pretty interesting
happened. I discovered the art of the deep n’ meaningful.
After a somewhat confronting incident of
finding condomns in my friends bedside table (he did, and does, have a
girlfriend) I knew that something about the way I was conducting my life had to
change. I had many talks to many different people, with the chief topic being
how to be a better person. How to be there for others, how to be a part of a
group, how to make jokes that are funny, how to laugh at yourself, and rather
importantly, how to get girls to like you.
The conclusion to my lost in a strange
suburb in the middle of the night story is a good example of how I have changed
over time.
There was the old me, a grumpy, cynical,
self-absorbed, and wholly unattractive character (in both looks and personality.)
This character would have been lost with no hope of getting back home, and
would have done something like this:
Step 1: Criticized everything around him. His
phone battery life, the lack of street signs, the poor lighting, the person who
took the map book out of the car. Everything.
Step 2: Sat and moped. Climbed into the
front seat, been tired and lost and hopeless, and just sat and let himself
become more miserable.
Step 3: Probably gone to sleep and waited
till morning. Then asked someone for directions, and driven home.
But the new me is a little different. My
deep n’ meaningfuls had taught me new things, new ways to think, and new
mindsets to adopt. They taught me to not be afraid to admit one owns fault, and
seek help from others. They also taught me that I should take responsibility for
my problems, and not blame the world around me. And most importantly, they
taught me that I needed to take action. I could sit and think for my whole
life, waiting for the perfect situation to come along, and then it would be no
challenge for me to get what I want, but this was never going to happen.
Fundamentally, I expected the world to just
take care of me, to meet my needs and wants, and for me to not have to try. This
changed. The world was not going to deliver what I wanted, I had to get it for
myself.
So instead of sitting in my car and
sulking, I did this:
Step 1: I walked to the street and waited
for a car to pass, hoping to ask for directions.
Step 2: I saw a taxi come by, and I tried
to wave it down, but it kept driving up the street, so I chased after it.
However, as I run slower than a car, it got away from me.
Step 3: Look around for a moment, wondering
if there were any phones around, and notice a police car come driving by.
Step 4: Wave it down, cause police actually
will stop if being waved down, and ask for directions.
Step 5: Get in your car, and follow behind
them as they generously drive 10 minutes out of their way to get you to a
highway.
So my deep n’ meaningfuls that started at
that point have brought about a major change in me, that I think is for the
better. This blog definitely wouldn’t have happened if I was still the old me. Plus,
it has made me closer with my friends, allowed me to make new friends, gotten
me a number of girlfriends (a small number, but still,) and overall made me a
more positive and proactive person.
Andrew, I’m looking forward toy our blog
tomorrow.
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